Avoiding interventions, tests and drugs unless medically required for the health and safety of mother or baby will allow a mothers’ hormones to stay in balance and create the best chance for a positive and healthy birthing experience.
A mother will generally feel more confident and positive if she better understands the natural bodily processes of pregnancy and labour, allowing the oxytocin to flow. There are many pregnancy classes, such as yoga, hypnobirthing, meditation or childbirth classes which can be hugely beneficial.
It helps greatly if a mother is able to make informed decisions about where to birth her baby, her care providers and a birth support team to support her personal choices. This ensures an environment that provides the best chance for a positive birth experience and successful bonding with her baby. A labouring mother will produce more oxytocin if the environment feels safe, is quiet, the lighting is dim and she feels as undisturbed and unobserved as possible.
If a mother is aware of what situations may cause her anxiety, a plan can be made for how to avoid them. Similarly, knowing what best helps a mother feel happy and relaxed is equally important. Have a scented flower or her favourite essential oil to smell, play her favourite music, have meditations or affirmations to say or a mantra to chant. Physical touch increases oxytocin levels, so massages during pregnancy and labour are ideal. If a full body massage is not possible, even a 5-minute foot, back or shoulder rub or a nice long hug will help.
As well as having a supportive partner or family member by her side, having a trained doula to create and protect a private space and provide continual care for the mother will help ensure her needs are met at all times and allow her to feel comfortable and confident to immerse herself in the birthing process undisturbed.
Skin-to-skin contact with her baby and breastfeeding shortly after birth are ideal ways to get the oxytocin flowing. Keeping mother and baby close (ideally skin-to-skin) and frequently breastfeeding during the postnatal period is important for the mother’s natural mothering instincts to blossom and makes for a contented baby.
Having at least 6 weeks to rest after birth is the best way for new mothers, babies and their family to begin a successful journey together. Mothers undergo many physical and hormonal changes after birth and need time to recover. Mothers can be best supported during the important postpartum period by employing a postpartum doula, hiring home help and enlisting the assistance of friends and family who care for and support the mother (rather than just cuddling the new baby, as tempting as it is!). This will ensure that her only job is to rest, breastfeed and spend time bonding with her baby. Mothers who are unable to breastfeed can boost their bonding by maintaining skin-to-skin contact with their baby whilst they feed them a bottle.
Receiving a gift is known to increase oxytocin levels, so if friends are not able to be present to prepare a meal, do household chores or give an oxytocin boosting hug, a card or gift will still help! Laughter is also very beneficial to stimulate the happy hormones, so surrounding new mums with a positive, fun attitude is always helpful.
In the days and weeks after birth, the regulation of hormones is a delicate balancing act. Some things that can help to resettle hormones include eating a nutritious balanced diet, limiting caffeine, keeping hydrated, getting plenty of sleep (often tricky with a newborn. Sleep at every opportunity!), soaking up the sunshine (to increase Vitamin D), doing light exercise, using relaxation techniques and spending time cuddling and bonding with her baby, partner and any older children. Having time to do all these things is very difficult for a new mother, so building a supportive network is crucial to ensure she can focus on her and her baby’s needs rather than having to juggle household chores or other work.
Becoming a mother is a huge change and difficulties with bonding and breastfeeding are very common. It is important for mothers struggling during the antenatal period to seek advice from healthcare providers as soon as possible. Early help can prevent little problems from becoming big ones. Asking for help is not a weakness, but can rather be perceived as honouring the enormity and importance of motherhood. The expectations placed on new mothers are often unrealistic. We can all help every mother to be continuously supported so that they can focus on their transformation into motherhood and nurturing their babies with peaceful confidence.
